Back in Iowa

I am back in Iowa--Des Moines this time--teaching a class and giving a talk at the White Rose Film Festival.

The class was this morning. A great group of actors. And the films I have seen have been fantastic. My "Keynote" speech is tonight. More later...

I took this pic while waiting for my bags after my casting trip to Iowa. Nothing like customer service...

Video Clip of Today's Iowa Open Casting Call

This is a video clip of the line of people waiting to audition this morning....

COTCvideoclip

Children of the Corn-Iowa Casting

I arrived in Iowa late Wednesday night, and have spent the last two days from 10am -7pm seeing local actors. Production placed ads in the local newspapers, the director has done interviews on radio and TV inviting kids to come audition, and my assistant, Ben Easter (more on him later), even went to the Iowa County Fair and handed out flyers headed with the title "Want to be in a movie?"

We were all so worried that no one would come to the casting call. Ha! On our first day people were lined up around the block! We couldn't keep up with them. It was completely overwhelming. If it wasn't for Ben and Production Assistant Melinda Burns, I would have spent the day cowering in my hotel room crying

On day one of casting, kids (with their parents) arrived as early as 6:30am to be first in line for our 10am start. We were behind even before we started the day.

Then we had to walk along the line of people and decide who would be pulled into my office to read lines. I have to confess, I just didn't have the stomach for this. I couldn't walk down that line and say "you" "you" "you", passing over some hopeful eight-year-old and his eager mother. I am a coward. I made Ben do it.

In the room reading, the kids were all sweet and of course somewhat nervous. I definitely found some talented kids who will be reading for the director this weekend.

There were a few chilling moments--examples of overly ambitious parenting. A young girl of maybe thirteen read, her reading was good, but she had braces on her teeth. I told her gently that because of the setting of the film, we couldn't use any kids with braces (there is no "Orthodontist of the Corn"), I wanted her to know that it wasn't that she did a bad reading--it was a "look" thing. Ben told me that her mother pulled him aside after the audition and said forcefully :"I want you to know that I will have her braces taken off. This is THAT important!" Ben was stunned. Having a small part in our little TV Movie is so important that she would put her child's well-being second? I am worried about the message this young girl is getting about the priorities of her life.

I was a child actor, I started at age six, and I definitely had some emotional fall-out from spending my formative years in the competitive world of show biz. The sets were great, it was the auditioning. Whether or not she gets the job, I think it is dangerous for a child to be in a situation where they will be "picked" or "not picked". I had enough trauma in the schoolyard when the "captains" picked teams for the softball games. Being hopelessly afraid of the ball, I was always picked last. (Don't even get me started about Dodge Ball--having bright red hair, there I was picked first!) Now imagine an almost weekly situation where I was led into a room full of adults and asked to "perform", and then waiting for the phone to ring to hear if I got the job.

For many years, I wouldn't teach acting to kids. I felt that they should be sheltered from this kind of life. But around a year ago I started giving private lessons to a little girl named Madeline Stauffer. When her mother contacted me we had a chat and I realized that she was a completely supportive and caring parent. She explained that Madeline was driven to become an actor and she wanted to give her the support to explore her dreams. Madeline gets great grades at school and has plenty of other extra-curricular activities so I know she is having the full "childhood" experience. And she approaches her work with me with absolute dedication and seriousness. While I know she has dreams of being the next Miley Cyrus, she also has a deep love of the craft, she wants to be a great actor. It is my pleasure to help her towards this goal.

If it wasn't for Madeline I don't think I would have been able to do this job of casting "Children of the Corn". She has helped me to understand that acting can be a wonderful enhancement to a child's life. I love meeting each child who comes in to read. I feel like I have a chance to make them feel safe and accepted, and in this way it is a kind of healing for me. I get to give the kind of audition experience I would have liked to have had when I was a little girl.

OK. More soon. I am off to another day of Iowa casting! Until then, enjoy this clip of me in my first acting job. A "Kool-aid" commercial. I'm six. I'm the one with the curly hair.
Kool-aid A-gogo

Casting Children of the Corn

I have a new job in addition to my duties as an actor and acting teacher. I am the Casting Director for a remake of the 70's cult horror film "Children of the Corn".

This is an amazing experience. Every professional actor should put in some time as a Casting Director as part of their training. I wish I had done this twenty years ago--it would have saved me a lot of mistakes.

No time for details now, I am off to conduct a casting sesson. More later!

Liam Neeson in Beckett's "Eh Joe"

Check out this article about Liam Neeson's perfomance in "Eh Joe", currently playing at Lincoln Center in NYC. Be sure to click on the link to the multi-media slide show....

Click here to read article.

Audition Technique

Many actors are confused about whether or not they should memorize their lines for their TV and Film auditions. One camp says to always be "off book" and another says to barely look at the material so that it stays "fresh". I believe that each audition is different. Sometimes I memorize the text completely, sometimes just sections. Sometimes at a reading I am asked to stay and read for another role so if I am married to the idea of always memorizing I am in big trouble.

I have had a lot of writers, producers, directors and casting people come out and speak to my class about auditioning and they all agree that they don't care at all if an actor has the lines memorized. In fact the writers, who are usually the executive producers on the shows we audition for, always prefer that actors use the script--they want to hear their lines read correctly! What all care deeply about is that the actor bring life to the role. The actor should be as memorized as necessary to accomplish this.

Here is a video I found on YouTube of Hugh Laurie auditioning for House MD. I think it is a great example of an actor using the script while still bringing a full realization of the character.

Click here to see the video.

Note when Mr. Laurie apologizes for his appearance at the beginning of the clip, saying that "things haven't been going well lately". I may be completely wrong here, but I suspect his choice of appearance was quite deliberate. Perfect for the role.

NYC Tango Dancers

One last NYC moment: I was in a clothing shop on 40th street killing time before heading out to see "In The Heights" when a flash of red caught my eye through a window into an adjacent building. I looked closer and saw what appeared to be some kind of kid's ballroom dancing competition. I grabbed a bit of video footage. Enjoy.

Click here to view clip

In The Heights

My last night in NYC I saw the Tony Award winning musical In The Heights. A joyous ending to a fabulous trip.

This play oozed with the guileless enthusiasm of its creator Lin-Manuel Miranda. You could feel the energy walking into the theater. The audience broke out in cheers several times throughout the performance. An invigorating, splendid night of theater!

Click here to see Lin-Manuel Miranda's acceptance speech/rap when he received the Tony for best score. His genuine gratitude and humility is palpable. Inspiring.

New York City

 I am  in the final day of my NYC vacation. I came here to get inspired and this city never fails me. So far I have seen November by David Mamet, August: Osage County by Tracy Letts and The 39 Steps.  

Each play inspired me in it's own way: November was wonderfully well-executed. Nathan Lane dropped his "Broadway Baby" schtick and delivered an hilarious and smart performance. Laurie Metcalf is a force of nature when she does comedy. She always does some kind of  wacked-out utterly surprising physical movement that astounds me. The 39 Steps was fun and it was pure pleasure to witness the virtuosity of the actors. I love movement-based theatre and the original choreographer of this play was trained in the LeCoq method, something I have always been deeply interested in. But the real stand-out for me was August: Osage County. This play is should be up there with Death of a Salesman  and The Crucible. It is truly an American masterpiece. I can't stop thinking about it. The writing and the performances were sublime. Particularly Amy Morton. She was magnificent. I have no idea why she wasn't nominated for a Tony. She is an amazing actor.  But really everyone was fantastic. I wept at the end, not just because of the subject, but because of being reminded of what a moving experience live theatre can be. Those actors and that particular audience, of which I was a part, shared a few hours together in an intimate and focused way that will never be repeated. That is part of what I love so much about live theatre. It is a living thing. The show is a little different each performance: the audience changes, laughing in a new place, or not laughing at all. The actors change--they are a day or a week or a month older, an actor has had a fight with their spouse hours before the show, or has a cold. Live performance is ephemeral. And when the performance is over there is no record. It burns to ash.

A couple of great NY moments: 

1. On the subway on Monday heading uptown, I glance to my left and see that one of the actors from August is sitting right next to me. Frank Wood. He played Bill Fordham. A wild coincidence since I had seen the show only  the day before.  I struck up a conversation--told him how much I loved the play. Incredibly nice guy and a great actor.

2. At the Met with my good friend Michael Lally. We were walking in a crowd and I was goofing with him and said in a funny voice "Get off my back."  A guy to my right says "You don't want to hang out with me then!" I turned to see a young attractive blind guy smiling at me, one hand grasping a cane and the other on his friends back as he was being guided through the crowd.  We cracked up.

The Fall

Saw Tarsem Singh's magnificent film The Fall yesterday. Gorgeous images and exquisite performances from Lee Pace and Cantinca Untaru. Here is a link to the website: The Fall

Singh's direction of the young Ms. Untaru is masterful. He pulled such unguarded truthful moments out of her--in particular the scene where "Roy" asks her if she was lying about his being able to feel his big toe. Her performance was breathtaking. It never felt like she was acting. We, the audience, were watching her as she lived through the events of the film. All acting techniques are designed to bring us to this kind of performance--back to a childlike, simple, ability to, as Sanford Meisner so famously said: behave truthfully under imaginary circumstances.

See it!

The Real Deal

I was talking to a a student the other day and he was apologetic that he "still had a day job." This guy is a high-school teacher who is so devoted to bettering his craft that he takes the bus across the valley (during rush-hour) to my acting class in Sherman Oaks after teaching all day in Pasadena. The trip can take up to two hours. To me he has no reason to apologize--he is a champion! Given these tough economic times--the fall out from the writers strike, the glut of reality TV, the high prices of gas and food--isn't it about time that we all stopped equating our acting income with our artistic worth? I thought this was a good time to share an article I wrote awhile back....

The Real Deal

Recently I was at a party and overheard someone say in a derisive tone “he describes himself as an actor but he's only had one job in the last five years.” I had to join in, “That's interesting. How often would he need to work for you to consider him an actor?” The person looked uncomfortable and couldn't come up with an answer.

What is an actor? Is being an actor about how many jobs you book? Having representation? Making money? If so, how much do you need to make? And what if you haven't worked for a while? How long does one need to be out of work to no longer have the right to call himself an actor? Three months? Three years? And who gets to decide the length of time?

It's remarkable what people will say to actors. Once, when I was on the phone discussing rates with a car insurance salesman, he asked me what I did, and when I told him that I was an actor he said “Someone once told me that if someone says they're an actor you should ask them if they make their medical to find out if they're the real deal. So” he asked, “do you make your medical?” I was astounded at his rudeness—I replied “Well yes actually. Now tell me, did you meet your sales quota last month?”

I have the blessing of being an acting teacher as well as an actor and my students are a constant source of inspiration. Being in class with them every week keeps me connected to what being an actor really means. Dedication, determination and most important, the heart of a champion.

I am reminded of the Dodgers in that amazing game in 2006. It was the 9^th inning and the Padres were winning 9-5. Figuring that their team was beat, the Dodger fans had begun to leave the stadium. Then, at the bottom of the 9^th, the Dodgers came back and hit four consecutive home runs--only the fourth time that's happened in an inning in major league history. Then Garciaparra hit a two-run homer in the 10^th and the Dodgers ended up winning 11-10. Now, if the Dodgers had lost their heart in the 9^th—thought to themselves 'we're obviously losing—there's really no reason to keep trying since we don't have a chance'—they would never have won that game.

I have a student with Parkinson's disease. This guy is one of the best actors in my class—very talented, but what blows me away is his heart. He has a full-time job, his arm shakes like crazy when he's tired or nervous, and yet he shows up every week rehearsed, his lines cold, and plays full out every time he gets on the stage. When that arm really gets shaking we say he “wears his heart on his sleeve.” I don't think the deal gets anymore real than that.

I have another student who also works a full-time “straight” job and is tremendously talented. He is so driven by his desire for excellence that he almost always has two scenes going at any given time. He is always meticulous about every aspect of his craft. The other day I received this email from him:

“…after 9 years of busting my ass, doing drops on lunch breaks, class, workshops, mailings, student films, working survival jobs that suck the soul out of me,…I have had a grand total of about 3 auditions for paid gigs…If I could ever get in the damned room, I could do some damage.Then again, no one said it was going to be easy, did they?”

This actor has the heart of a champion.

I don't believe that being an actor has anything to do with how much money you make or what kind of recognition you get from the industry. When someone is lucky enough to make their living solely from acting that's wonderful. But what really impresses me is what an actor does when he is not working.

Do you have the heart of a champion? Do you keep playing full out when the fans are leaving the stadium and it looks like there's no hope? Are you an actor? The real deal? The answer is in your own heart.

The Victory Groove or Throw Your Heart Over the Bar

On my morning walks I love to listen to inspirational audio books. I feel like it is a kind of brain washing--a good kind. I overwhelm any negative and/or anxious thoughts with positive ones. I find that for my daily “treatment”, the sweeter and cornier the book the better. My current favorite is Norman Vincent Peale reading from an abridged version of his classic “The Power of Positive Thinking.” Here is an excerpt:

“A famous Trapeze artist was instructing his students how to perform on the high trapeze bar. Finally, having given full explanations and instruction in this skill, he told them to demonstrate their ability.

One student, looking up at the insecure perch upon which he must perform, was suddenly filled with fear. He had a terrifying vision of himself falling to the ground. He couldn’t move a muscle, so deep was his fright. ‘I can’t do it! I can’t do it!’ he gasped.

The instructor put his arm around the boy’s shoulder and said, “Son, you can do it, and I will tell you how.” Then he made a statement which is of inestimable importance. It is one of the wisest remarks I have ever heard. He said, ‘Throw your heart over the bar and your body will follow.’…

Heart is the symbol of creative activity. Fire the heart with where you want to go and what you want to be. Get it fixed so deeply in your unconscious that you will not take no for an answer…’Throw your heart over the bar’ means to throw your affirmation over every barrier, throw your visualization over your obstacles. In other words, throw the spiritual essence of you over the bar and your material self will follow in the victory groove thus pioneered by your faith inspired mind. Expect the best, not the worst and you will attain your heart’s desire.”

____Norman Vincent Peale, The Power of Positive Thinking.

“The victory groove”…love it. Sounds like a Beat Poem. This book was written in 1952. Check it out…

Post "House" post (finally!)

A week ago I had the pleasure of doing a guest star role on the fabulous television show House.

It was great. The producers, director and the regular actors did their best to make me and the other guest actors feel welcome, from the table-read through the shoot. Just a wonderful experience.

House has a table-read (a read-through of the entire script with the full cast) before each weeks episodes filming begins. This is usual in half-hour comedy but not so much in one-hour. The pace of one-hour television shoots is usually too intense. In fact the actors on House give up their lunch hour to do the table-read. It is nice to have the opportunity for a read-through because you get a feeling of the flow of the show. And speaking for myself, it really helps create a feeling of ensemble. I feel like I am a part of the process of the whole show rather than just a gun-for-hire coming in for a day or two to shoot my scenes, often never even meeting the other actors on that weeks episode.

One of my students asked me how the regular actors performed at the table read---he asked if they were at “performance level”. He assumed that the guest actors would be because they could easily be replaced, but wondered about the regulars. The regular actors on House gave as much at this reading as the guests. In my experience most actors do. I think they realize how important is for everyone to get a real sense of the script. Especially the writers. There will often be re-writes after the table read. Especially in half-hour where the script changes sometimes after every run-through.

When I do a guest role on a show I really look at it like I am a guest in someone’s home. If I am invited for dinner I don't complain about the food, I don’t tell my hosts how they should rearrange their furniture. Likewise, on a set, I don’t change my lines--I learn them “word-perfect”, I show up on time. I know that if I am a gracious guest, I may be invited back. This was a great “House” to visit, the “hosts” were incredibly warm and gracious, I would love to visit again…

FYI: my episode is the first of the new season. It will air in the Fall.

House MD

I finished filming my role on "House" at 3am Saturday morning! I had a fantastic time. Will post details soon.

Luck

“Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.”—Seneca

I’ve had a string of good luck lately. I’ve gone from acting job to job for the last couple of months—did a pilot for a web series called In2iton, the episode of Two and a Half Men (read below) and now I am doing House M.D. It feels absolutely wonderful to be working and I am so grateful. For each of these jobs there were at least five other women who could have done the role as well as I, but I was lucky in that I matched the producers and/or directors visions for these roles. But I wouldn’t have been lucky had I not performed to the best of my ability at each of these auditions.

Before I booked these roles there were several auditions that I didn’t book. My auditions for those roles were just as strong as these last few. It’s not like suddenly I have changed—suddenly I have discovered some kind of booking “trick” or “formula” or “right” way to audition. Well, actually I am doing the one booking “trick” that I teach—the one I have always used in my thirty-year-plus career as a professional actor—the one “booking formula” that gives you the best shot at getting the job. Do great work. Always act to the best of your ability every time you get the chance to put your work out there.

Now I know that this probably sounds obvious, but believe me it’s not. I was talking to a Talent manager friend today and he shared with me a story about a client. This is a client who doesn’t often get a shot at series regular roles and my manager friend was thrilled that he was able to get this client an appointment for a regular role on a top series. He emailed the client the appointment and the sides two weeks ago and then today, the day of the audition, the client calls the office and says, “I can’t open the attachment that contains the sides.” My manager friend said he was absolutely speechless. He is considering dropping the client.

A few times a year I bring in a working professional from the entertainment industry into my Acting Studio for a seminar. I have a dear friend who is a top Talent manager, and she agreed to do a Q & A and then let my students read for her. I thought this would be a great opportunity for them to hone their audition skills in a safe environment and get their work seen at the same time. I pulled scenes from TV and Film for each student—doing my best to tailor them to each student’s strengths and I gave them the material a week before the she came out for the visit. The night of the seminar I found out that at least half of them had barely looked at the material!

When I was in classes when I was a young actor, if an industry guest came out and I had the chance to have my work seen I always did everything I could to make sure my work was as good as I could possibly make it. I was shocked when so many of my regular students didn’t’ do the same. I knew these students. Most of them had been with me several months--even several years. I knew they were hard workers, so what could explain their apparent laziness? And then I realized, it looked like laziness—but it wasn’t—it was fear.

Fear has many disguises: It can show up in the form of not putting enough time into preparation for auditions; not dressing appropriately; not keeping your PR tools (photos, demos, etc.) up-to-date; missing class; resisting direction; or being late for professional appointments. Recently I suffered from this last one myself. For a while last year I just could not seem to show up on time for my auditions. After a few weeks of this, I took a hard look at my behavior. And I realized that I was sub-consciously withholding from really doing my best at my auditions. I hadn’t booked in awhile and I was feeling frustrated, so, like a little kid throwing a temper tantrum, I was acting out by being late. But of course the only person being hurt by my tantrum was me.

If I pulled my punches, if I didn’t give my all, I was not really putting myself completely on the line. If I didn’t play full out--to the best of my ability--and got rejected, a part of me could think, well, I didn’t really show my best, so therefore it’s not a complete rejection, if I show my best and don’t get the part—that really hurts. But of course that was wrong thinking.

For me the worst feeling is when I have a chance and I don’t grab it. When I don’t make the best of each and every opportunity. Of course it hurts when I give it my all and don’t get the role, but at least I gave it my best shot. I can live with that. When I don’t do my best, that’s what eats away at my soul. So, I have to be willing to go out there and put myself on the line, over and over again for as long as it takes. And then of course, I may get lucky

House

Just booked an episode of House. The table read was yesterday. What a great cast. I'm back to one-hour drama but the show has a lot of humor--thank god!

Two and a Half Men....post-job post....

Working on Two and a Half Men was a blast. I had forgotten how wonderful it is to work on a four-camera show. We rehearsed on Monday and Tuesday and then did some “pre-shoots” on Wednesday and Thursday—scenes that had a lot of complicated camera set-ups so wouldn’t be appropriate to shoot in front of a live audience. Then on Friday, more rehearsal and then we did the show in front of a live audience. The pre-shot scenes were shown in playback on monitors so the audience could get the flow of the show. As it turned out, most of my scenes were shot in front of the live audience. I was a little nervous—it’s been a few years since I did a play and I haven’t done a sitcom in forever but as soon as I heard that laughter I felt like I was home. All my old comedy chops came back. Holding for the laugh—sometimes getting another one if you hold correctly—letting the wave of laughter subside and then feeling it start to swell again--the laughs are so addicting!

On the night of the show, there were several times (between scenes of course!) that I felt moved to tears for being there. Having the perspective of knowing so many talented actors who rarely if ever get the chance to work (and spending plenty of time out-of-work myself!) makes me so appreciative when I get to work as an actor. It really feels like a gift. The auditioning, the rejections, the having faith when all seems lost is the real work of the actor. The job is the pay off! A manager I know tells new actors that their job is not acting, it is auditioning, and I think she’s right. And I don’t just mean the audition itself. It’s all that in between time. Keeping your spirit and your acting chops up when you don’t have any auditions. Then finally getting one and preparing—giving it your all and then after the audition—what I call the after-burn—not hearing anything. Was I good? Did they like me? We actors rarely get feedback on our work. Certainly if you get the job or a callback after a pre-read that is your feedback, but at the producer callback level the playing field is pretty even-most everyone there can do the role and do it well—at that point it’s mostly a matter of type. Are you the producer and/or directors vision? All you can control is the quality of your acting work; you can’t control their creative process or subjective opinions. The fact is that you are probably not going to book most of the roles you go in for but that doesn’t necessarily mean you are doing a bad job. Look at me and my Two and a Half Men experience—I auditioned for that show four times before I got a role. Believe me, if I had been doing a bad job on my auditions the producers would not have kept bringing me back.

And now for the other kind of “after-burn”, the post-job blues…sigh…but before that, here are some pics from Two and a Half Men.

Robert Wagner. Yum! I love having the chance to work with Hollywood Icons like "RJ." I always feel like I am connected to Hollywood history. When I touch him I am connected to Natalie Wood, Jill St. John--wow! And he is still such a looker!
Jon Cryer is an absolute sweetheart. And of course a comic genius. Turns out that our parents worked together in the early 1960's! It was a production of Guys and Dolls, my dad played "Skye Masterson" and my mother and his parents were in the chorus!
Holland Taylor has been added to my list of all time favorite actresses. Watching her work was an acting lesson. Brilliant! And gracious and beautiful too. (BTW: that chest is not entirely mine...part of a gag in the show...EGADS!)
Conchatta Farrel is warm, kind, supportive, sensitive and yet another comic genius. Meeting her was an absolute gift. The women on this show are incredible.

OK. Remember to watch on Monday May 5th! (I play a CSI-Marg Helgenberger type....)

Two and a Half Men

Just an update. I have been busy rehearsing and taping. This week has been marvelous. A real gift. I am reminded how wonderful it is to work on a sit-com in contrast to one-hour. We rehearse! What a concept!

My role is great. I get to work with every actor on the show and they are all magnificent. Particularly Holland Taylor. I can't take my eyes off her. An amazing actor! Watching her work is a lesson in comic acting--always based on truth and frigging hilarious.

I tape most of my scenes tonight in front of a live audience. Can't wait! Details in my next blog.

Dream!

What an inspiring week this was.

Several years ago, my father understudied a role in Joe Bolonga and Renee Taylor's Bermuda Avenue Triangle during its LA run. Because of prior commitments Bolonga and Taylor couldn't use him when they took the show to New York, but they told him that they loved him and were determined to work with him again.

I was going through a very dark time in my life, my teacher Roy London had just died and I was going through a very painful breakup of a long-term relationship. I was feeling very pessimistic. I said something to my dad like, “Oh people always say stuff like that, you’re such a dreamer.” He replied, “ I have to have my dreams, they’re what keep me going.” I felt like I had snapped out of a dream. A bad one. And then I felt so ashamed.

This interaction led me to a real change of heart--I vowed to never stop dreaming and staying positive and to always be supportive of my fellow actors— ultimately it led to my teaching career. Well, last Monday, my seventy-five-year-old actor father learned that he is joining Joe Bolonga, Renee Taylor and Lainie Kazan on a tour of Bermuda Avenue Triangle in Florida later this month.

Then , Thursday, I went to Hollywood Blvd to see a family friend receive a star on the legendary walk of fame. The friend is actress Kate Linder. She has had a regular role on the Soap Opera, Young and the Restless for 25 years. Her longevity on the show plus her abundant philanthropic work—Linder is active with the Make-A-Wish Foundation, is a founding board member of TV Cares, the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences’ AIDS awareness charity and also spent this past Thanksgiving visiting troops in Afghanistan and Pakistan with the USO—is impressive enough, but what blew me away was when I found out that she never gave up her day job after booking the Soap—on weekends she still works as a flight attendant for United Airlines! I just love that!

Later that day I learned that I booked a really great guest star role on one of my favorite shows, Two and a Half Men. I have been auditioning for this show since it began. I thought I would never get hired, and this despite the fact that the creators of the show are both friends of mine. But, once again, it is proven to me that life has endless possibilities and surprises if you just keep showing up. And, of all the roles I have auditioned for on that show, this is my favorite-the one I would have picked for myself!

Keep showing up. Never stop dreaming. And remember, the person who’s star catches your gaze as you stroll down the Hollywood Walk of Fame can be the same person who asks if you want an extra pillow on your next flight out to New York…

Keep Going!

The other day I received an email from an actor who has been in LA for ten years and even though he’s been relentless with his mailings etc., he has yet to get a manager or agent. He wrote about his despondency about not going on meetings: “I'm getting to the point now where I don't know how much longer I can go on with having every professional attempt I've made get rejected…when you continually put out effort year after year, the smallest little break, even if it's just a meeting or an audition can recharge your energy, even your spirit. I'm starting to run very low on both.” He has a good day job but in his words “…no matter how good a job it is, it’s not acting.”

Whew. Most of the actors I know can relate to this. It is so tough out there. Tougher in many ways than when I started out. But, I remember when I started out, the older actors would complain about how tough the business was compared to when they started out. So, the business is always changing. And it's always been tough. I am reminded of Norma Desmond from Billy Wilder’s Sunset Blvd who couldn't make the jump from silent pictures into “talkies” and probably even more relevantly, from ingénue into woman-of-a-certain-age. She couldn't let go of her image of how her life was supposed to be so she was cut off from the possibilities of her present. What if she had allowed herself to change? To play supporting roles? I bet Mr. DeMille would have given her a job..another close-up.

The same day I received the email from that actor, I visited a manager friend in his office and guess what? The manager was despondent! He was so frustrated that he couldn't get a certain client in for a role--he was worried about changes in the business--he was worried that there will be another strike. So here you are—people on both sides of the table struggling with the same feelings. So what do we do? Well, the business has always been hard. It has always been a miracle that any of us have gotten work. But I know personally that the way to become really despondent is to focus on the problem. And from my perspective, I think the actor has it better in many ways than the manager. The manager is totally dependent on the acceptance of others—the casting directors etc. to give his clients an audition. His fulfillment comes from getting people work. The actor is also somewhat dependent on others too but the actor can find a way to do what he loves. He can go to class, if he can’t afford class then he can learn a new monologue or a new dialect, he can contact the AFI or one of the many local universities with great film departments and offer his acting services, he can audition for a play.

I saw the comedian Margaret Cho on TV the other night on a great show on CNN called The Big Idea. She was discussing how many times she was told to forget her dream of becoming a stand-up. In fact a top agent she met early on told her to give up because Asians never make in in show business. She didn’t listen because giving up was simply not a choice. She was doing what she loves. And she was going to continue doing it whether or not she was “successful” at it. I feel the same way. I know that as long as I am doing my work I am happy. When I am in the moment—that glorious moment when I am really “in” the scene-- where it feels like the part is playing me—I have no idea if I am getting paid, or how much I am getting paid or what my billing is or if I have a dressing room. I am just experiencing pure joy. And often, when I am completely fulfilled by the process of doing what I love and not paying attention-I get a little break. I’ll get an audition or role or maybe a sweet note from a student thanking me for something they heard in class. And it's enough to keep me going.

I always tell actors to give it a finite period of time to see if the acting thing works out—say thirty or forty years—if it doesn’t work in that time, then give it another twenty. You may or may not “succeed” (whatever the heck that means), but what a great time you'll have trying.

Calling All Fools

April 1, 2008
How apropos that I would make my first blog entry on April Fools Day. I love being foolish. I think that’s part of why I love being an actor and working with actors. Permission to be foolish. In Shakespeare’s work the Fool is often one of the wisest people in the story. In Twelfth Night, Feste the jester is described as "wise enough to play the fool." The fool was often sort of the conscious of the play. In that way I think actors can be society’s conscious. I think actors supply a real need. People go to the theatre, or to see a film to see their feelings, hopes and dreams depicted and played out, and, to use Aristotle’s word, to experience catharsis. And I think this catharsis is necessary for people. That is why we keep telling stories and listening to them--going to the theatre, seeing plays, reading stories. I am reminded of a few years ago when I did a play at Playmakers Rep in North Carolina. I have lived in Los Angeles virtually my entire life and started working as a professional actor at the age of six. With the exception of a few plays in High School and College, all the work I have ever done as an actor has been professional. Every time I did a play in Los Angeles, it seems there was always talk of this or that casting director or agent or movie star in the audience. There was always a bit of a “showcase” feeling--like doing the play might lead to more work. Don’t get me wrong—I know there is plenty of great work being done in the theatre in LA—I am just talking about my personal experience in some of the productions I have been involved in. So, anyway, when I did this play in Chapel Hill, NC it was really the first time in my life that I knew that there weren’t going to be any casting directors, or agents, or movie stars out in the audience. That my performance was completely between me and god and the audience. A contract based on love. I, the audience, come here to be entertained, moved, possibly changed. I, the actor, step onto to the stage to hopefully entertain, move, and change you. The theatre was filled every night. The people came to the theater—they needed to come--to share their humanity. I fell in love with acting in a way I never had before. Foolishness. What a gift.